What To Do On A First Date
Our panel looked at “Dating for Dummies” by Dr. Joy Browne for best first-date ideas. Here is what Dr. Browne highly recommends for your first date:
– Museums. “At a museum, you get to meander through the halls, look at exhibits, and chat about anything that inspires you. It’s a great place to get to know each other and to see each other’s taste in art. Also, most museums are usually easy to get to and offer a place to eat. A museum is relaxed, easy, and inexpensive.”
– Amusement parks. “Going to an amusement park is usually fun….”
– Walks. “You can take walks almost anywhere: Parks, zoos, botanical gardens, etc. It’s inexpensive, fun, and pressure-free. Plus you can often hold hands.”
– Outdoor activities in general: Sporting events, concerts, and picnics are great places for first dates…It’s easy and relaxed, and clothing usually isn’t a problem.
What about movies for the first date? The whatyousay panel thinks that movies should be added to the highly recommended list.
Here’s why. For a first date, a movie is the entertainment. You won’t have to struggle to keep a conversation going.
It is true that you can’t talk in a movie — or at least you should not talk unless you’re willing to risk the displeasure of those around you–but you will be able to find something to discuss later.
(You can do that conversation later with open-ended questions. “What did you think about the performance of ….? etc. What did you think about the way the movie ended?” If you get a short answer, like “I didn’t like it,” you can follow up with another question that requires more than a yes-or-no answer–like, “How would you have ended it?” The answer to that question will tell you a lot about your date. )
A movie is also a good place to hold hands, and to engage in other non-verbal behavior. But do be cautious on your first date, unless you get unmistakable go-ahead signals.
We highly recommend that you read movie reviews before you go. You don’t want your first movie to be one that both of you hate.
Plan for inexpensive and informal refreshments afterwards–with an emphasis on “inexpensive” and “informal”—such as Starbucks or a pizza.
You can chat about the movie over coffee, tea, or pizza and beer.
The whatyousay panel agrees with “Dating for Dummies” that the first date should not be too long. Keep this part of the evening relatively short unless there is clearly powerful chemistry between you. In that case, the panel leaves the two of you to your own devices.
If your first date is a terrific success, and you’re a guy, the panel recommends sending flowers.
If you don’t have a good prospect for a first date, here’s something you can do about it.
Do you need more more first-date advice? Here’s an easy way to get your own copy of “Dating For Dummies.”